Boat Boys

Dad's Dock

4–8 (0.333) · 67 RF / 93 RA · RD -26

FHTV SCOUTING: power SMOLDERING · glove STEADY · soul HOLLOW

One summer, a group of dads collectively built one boat. They have called each other 'Captain' ever since. None of them agree on who the real captain is. This has never been resolved and is not expected to be. They joined Hellball because the boat deserved a second chapter. Nobody on the team knows how Hellball works. All of them have opinions. Dad's Dock is in a desert. It experiences unexplained tidal surges. Maritime weather advisories are regularly issued for inland districts during home games. The league stopped investigating after season 3. The surges continue.

“PLAY THAT FUCKING TRACK - LIMP BIZKIIIIT”

• Maritime advisories regularly issued for inland districts on home-game days.
• League investigators officially stopped explaining the tidal surges four seasons ago.
• Multiple captains. Disputes about who is captain are resolved on the field. Not always symbolically.
• The boat was built in one summer. It holds together. The team treats this as proof of something.
• No Boat Boy has ever agreed on what makes someone a captain. This is considered a team value.
• The fans know things about this stadium that the stadium authority won't confirm.
• Someone always brings a cursed snack. It does involve Nutella.
• The bullpen catcher is widely considered a federal observer.
• If the tide rises mid-game, fans remove their shoes. Just in case.
• Rival sections yell: “They play like they owe Erik money.”