FHTV · PLAYER FILE
Wayne (Disputed Captain)
Outback Knives · loud about lawns · carries a single oar
FHTV DOSSIER
IDENT
The fans settled on “Interference Call” some time ago. Appeals were denied. Ask any usher — polite to the broadcast crew. Notably.
FIELD NOTES
Approaches the plate to: “Their own name, whispered by the PA at full volume.” Scouts agree on one point only: salutes the scoreboard whether or not it is on.
APPENDIX
A concessions vendor volunteered the following: “Sold sponsorship space on their batting helmet to an entity.”
— Filed under mild protest.
STAT LINE · CAREER
| Power | SMOLDERING |
|---|---|
| Glove | MAGNETIC |
| Soul | QUIET BLESSED |
| Games | 24 |
| At-bats | 119 |
| Hits | 43 |
| Home runs | 3 |
| RBI | 25 |
| Batting avg | .361 |
BY SEASON
| Season | AB | H | HR | RBI | BA |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| S2 | 53 | 20 | 0 | 15 | .377 |
| S1 | 66 | 23 | 3 | 10 | .348 |
PERSONAL NARRATIVE · WEATHER EVENTS