Boat Boys 1 — 7 Outback Knives
♡ Onion Mist at the Steakhouse. The Knives smell SHARP.
BROADCAST DETAILS
HEX “Boats at Knives. Before we start: whoever parked in the west lot, move your car. You know why. You'll know why.”
RIOT “I ALREADY LOVE THIS GAME AND IT HASN'T STARTED.”
RIOT “HEADS UP — ONION MIST. Literally. Heads. Up.”
RIOT “I DON'T BELIEVE IN OMENS.”
HEX “They know. They find it charming.”
RIOT “FEATURED SOUL: EARL (DISPUTED CAPTAIN). “Spider-Eyed Honestly”. that walkup changed me. Thirty seconds of a dial-up modem reaching something.”
RIOT “THEY'RE CHANTING “DO NOT LOOK UP”. do you hear them. DO YOU HEAR THEM.”
RIOT “KNIVES CROWD UPDATE: Bad calls are met with thrown Outback Steakhouse napkins. RESPECT.”
RIOT “KNIVES LEAD 4–1 THROUGH 3. THE CROWD IS VEILED. AS THEY SHOULD BE.”
HEX “The home crowd has stopped acknowledging the visitors exist.”
RIOT “KNIVES 6. BOATS 1. THAT'S NOT A SCORE THAT'S A CRIME SCENE.”
HEX “The crowd was veiled before. The shift you're feeling is real. It has a name. I'm not saying it on air.”
HEX “Knives, 7–1, final. Soul of the game: Vera Looms, 4-for-9 with 2 home runs. I'd act surprised, but you'd feel the lie through the screen.”
RIOT “AND THAT WAS *WITH* ONION MIST GOING ON. UNBELIEVABLE.”
HEX “The broadcast ends. The game continues somewhere. It always does. Goodnight.”
RIOT “GOODNIGHT. I MEAN IT. GO.”
- 🌫 ONION MIST: Empty Manila Folder Boris (Knives) gains 1 POWER (now 8.0).
Boats 0 1 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 R 1
Knives 2 1 1 2 0 0 1 0 X R 7
| Player | AB | H | HR | RBI | BA |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Roy (Captain Emeritus) | 7 | 2 | 2 | 0 | .285 |
| Hank (The Real Captain) | 6 | 1 | 0 | 0 | .166 |
| Stan (Also Captain) | 4 | 1 | 0 | 1 | .250 |
| Chuck (Co-Captain) | 3 | 1 | 0 | 0 | .333 |
| Wayne (Disputed Captain) | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | .500 |
| Florence Drift | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | .500 |
| Steve (Also Captain) | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | .000 |
| Earl (Disputed Captain) | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | .000 |
| Forgotten Gym Bag Janice | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | .000 |
| Player | AB | H | HR | RBI | BA |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Vera Looms | 9 | 4 | 2 | 4 | .444 |
| Constance of the Veil | 5 | 3 | 1 | 1 | .600 |
| Hilda the Reach | 6 | 2 | 0 | 1 | .333 |
| Mavis the Towering | 5 | 2 | 0 | 1 | .400 |
| Hank (Allegedly Captain) | 3 | 1 | 0 | 0 | .333 |
| Beryl the Unsmiling | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | .000 |
| Mavis Edgewise | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | .000 |
| Hilda the Unsmiling | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | .000 |
| Empty Manila Folder Boris | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | .000 |
--- Boats @ Knives (The Steakhouse) --- ─── top of the 1st ────────────────────────── Nothing happens. A complimentary side cools, undisturbed. ─── bot of the 1st ────────────────────────── Mavis the Towering (looming) slices one down the line. Hilda the Reach (incorporeal) drives one past the third baseman. The complimentary side at her seat is now cold. ─── top of the 2nd ────────────────────────── Stan (Also Captain) (Captain) takes a thoughtful swing. Hank (The Real Captain) (grilling-adjacent) works a hit, then yells something about thermostats. ─── bot of the 2nd ────────────────────────── Vera Looms (looming) sails one OVER THE BLOOMIN' ONION. Constance of the Veil is here. Then she's there. Then she's hit a single. ─── top of the 3rd ────────────────────────── Roy (Captain Emeritus) (grilling-adjacent) drives one into the harbor. Roy (Captain Emeritus) insists this was on purpose. ─── bot of the 3rd ────────────────────────── Vera Looms makes contact. The ball seems hesitant. Constance of the Veil carves a base hit through the gap. ─── top of the 4th ────────────────────────── Hank (Allegedly Captain) hits a slow grounder. The Captains nod approvingly at the technique. Wayne (Disputed Captain) (loud about lawns) hits a slow grounder. The Captains nod approvingly at the technique. ─── bot of the 4th ────────────────────────── Vera Looms crushes one. The ball is later found pre-sliced. Constance of the Veil takes a long, ghostly swing and singles. Mavis the Towering swings through the bat and still hits the ball. ─── top of the 5th ────────────────────────── Chuck (Co-Captain) works a hit, then yells something about thermostats. ─── bot of the 5th ────────────────────────── Three up, three down at The Steakhouse. The Knives go quietly. Somewhere a knife clatters. ─── top of the 6th ────────────────────────── Three up, three down at The Steakhouse. The Knives go quietly. Somewhere a knife clatters. ─── bot of the 6th ────────────────────────── Florence Drift settles into a stance taller than the umpire and singles. ─── top of the 7th ────────────────────────── Roy (Captain Emeritus) swings and the ball clears the marina. Someone tries to take credit for the boat. ─── bot of the 7th ────────────────────────── Vera Looms hovers, then strikes a base hit through the 5-6 hole. Hilda the Reach singles. The Steakhouse smells more strongly. ─── top of the 8th ────────────────────────── Three up, three down at The Steakhouse. The Knives go quietly. Somewhere a knife clatters. ─── bot of the 8th ────────────────────────── Nothing happens. A complimentary side cools, undisturbed. ─── top of the 9th ────────────────────────── Nothing happens. A complimentary side cools, undisturbed. FINAL: Boats 1 — Knives 7 WEATHER: Onion Mist 🌫 ONION MIST: Empty Manila Folder Boris (Knives) gains 1 POWER (now 8.0).