Level 42 9 — 4 Boat Boys
♡ Captain's Council convened. A Boat will become competent. Cute.
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AURELIA “Tonight's matchup: Lvl42 at Boats. The line has moved four times. It apologized once. I accepted, professionally.”
RIOT “CORRECT. FIRST PITCH IMMINENT. HYDRATE.”
RIOT “WEATHER REPORT. CAPTAIN'S COUNCIL. PLAY CONTINUES BECAUSE OF COURSE IT DOES.”
RIOT “THE BOOKS. WHAT DO THE BOOKS SAY.”
AURELIA “The books say please stop shouting at the books.”
AURELIA “Scouting note on Suspiciously Damp Phil — “The Pre-Game Omen” to the fans. Walkup routine as follows: Hold music from the league front office. The books adjust accordingly. I don't ask how.”
RIOT “Word around the league: a Saint Static frequency favorite.”
RIOT “THE LVL42 SECTION IS CHANTING “THE BAT BOY KNOWS SOMETHING” AND HONESTLY? SAME.”
AURELIA “Sixteen ticks of movement. Nobody knows why. Nobody ever knows why.”
RIOT “ONE. RUN. GAME. LVL42 2, BOATS 1. THE CROWD IS CRYING TOGETHER. hold me.”
AURELIA “The locals are becoming unreasonable.”
AURELIA “Noting for the record: Suspicious fog crossed the infield. The record grows stranger by the season and nobody will let me archive it.”
RIOT “4–4 THROUGH 10. NOBODY BLINKS. I LOVE TIES. I HATE TIES. BOTH.”
AURELIA “Concession workers have stopped pretending to work.”
AURELIA “Lvl42 close it out, 9–4. Soul of the game: Forgotten Gym Bag Janice, 4-for-8 with 1 home run. The closing line was... close. I'll take it. I'll take anything at this point.”
RIOT “CORRECT.”
RIOT “GOODNIGHT FUTURE HELL. same time tomorrow. SAME EVERYTHING TOMORROW.”
AURELIA “Filed. Goodnight.”
- ⚓ CAPTAIN'S COUNCIL: Roy (Captain Emeritus) finally figured out the glove. +1 GLOVE (now 10.0).
Lvl42 0 1 0 0 1 0 0 0 1 1 0 0 0 5 R 9
Boats 0 0 0 0 1 0 1 1 0 1 0 0 0 0 R 4
| Player | AB | H | HR | RBI | BA |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Forgotten Gym Bag Janice | 8 | 4 | 1 | 4 | .500 |
| Suspiciously Damp Carl | 6 | 2 | 2 | 2 | .333 |
| Birthday Card Susan | 4 | 2 | 1 | 0 | .500 |
| Tepid Soup Karen | 4 | 2 | 0 | 1 | .500 |
| Coffee Cup Margaret | 10 | 1 | 1 | 0 | .100 |
| Wet Umbrella Dennis | 9 | 1 | 0 | 1 | .111 |
| Forgotten Gym Bag Kevin | 6 | 1 | 0 | 0 | .166 |
| Suspiciously Damp Phil | 5 | 1 | 0 | 1 | .200 |
| Birthday Card Margaret | 4 | 1 | 0 | 1 | .250 |
| Player | AB | H | HR | RBI | BA |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Hank (Allegedly Captain) | 8 | 1 | 0 | 0 | .125 |
| Roy (Captain Emeritus) | 5 | 1 | 0 | 1 | .200 |
| Stan (Also Captain) | 8 | 0 | 0 | 0 | .000 |
| Steve (Also Captain) | 8 | 0 | 0 | 0 | .000 |
| Earl (Disputed Captain) | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | .000 |
| Chuck (Co-Captain) | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | .000 |
| Earl (Captain Emeritus) | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | .000 |
--- Lvl42 @ Boats (Dad's Dock) --- ─── top of the 1st ────────────────────────── Scoreless inning. A flare is almost wasted. ─── bot of the 1st ────────────────────────── Three up, three down at Dad's Dock. The boat takes on a little water. ─── top of the 2nd ────────────────────────── Birthday Card Margaret (floor 42 stare) drives one. The button for floor 41 does not light up. ─── bot of the 2nd ────────────────────────── Hank (The Real Captain) (grilling-adjacent) hits a slow grounder. The Captains nod approvingly at the technique. ─── top of the 3rd ────────────────────────── Coffee Cup Margaret hits a homer. Several other Level 42 players begin to cry, beautifully. ─── bot of the 3rd ────────────────────────── Scoreless inning. A flare is almost wasted. ─── top of the 4th ────────────────────────── Scoreless inning. A flare is almost wasted. ─── bot of the 4th ────────────────────────── Hank (Allegedly Captain) works a hit. A discussion of knot-tying breaks out at first base. ─── top of the 5th ────────────────────────── Forgotten Gym Bag Janice hits one as the song hits the bridge. ─── bot of the 5th ────────────────────────── Wayne (Disputed Captain) (loud about lawns) works a hit. A discussion of knot-tying breaks out at first base. ─── top of the 6th ────────────────────────── Three up, three down at Dad's Dock. The boat takes on a little water. ─── bot of the 6th ────────────────────────── Scoreless inning. A flare is almost wasted. ─── top of the 7th ────────────────────────── Three up, three down at Dad's Dock. The boat takes on a little water. ─── bot of the 7th ────────────────────────── Tepid Soup Karen works a hit, then yells something about thermostats. ─── top of the 8th ────────────────────────── Three up, three down at Dad's Dock. The boat takes on a little water. ─── bot of the 8th ────────────────────────── Wayne (Disputed Captain) singles. The other Captains weigh in. ─── top of the 9th ────────────────────────── Suspiciously Damp Phil drives one out and the elevator briefly descends an unspecified amount. Birthday Card Susan swings while the song is in the second verse. ─── bot of the 9th ────────────────────────── Quiet at Dad's Dock. The Captains argue about who left the rope unsecured. ─── top of the 10th ───────────────────────── extra innings: top of the 10th Suspiciously Damp Carl sends one out as the bridge plays. The carpet smells different now. Birthday Card Susan singles. The doors do not open. ─── bot of the 10th ───────────────────────── Roy (Captain Emeritus) swings, makes contact, and immediately criticizes his own follow-through. Hank (The Real Captain) (grilling-adjacent) fouls one off, mutters something nautical. ─── top of the 11th ───────────────────────── extra innings: top of the 11th Three up, three down at Dad's Dock. The boat takes on a little water. ─── bot of the 11th ───────────────────────── Scoreless inning. A flare is almost wasted. ─── top of the 12th ───────────────────────── extra innings: top of the 12th Scoreless inning. A flare is almost wasted. ─── bot of the 12th ───────────────────────── Quiet at Dad's Dock. The Captains argue about who left the rope unsecured. ─── top of the 13th ───────────────────────── extra innings: top of the 13th Scoreless inning. A flare is almost wasted. ─── bot of the 13th ───────────────────────── Scoreless inning. A flare is almost wasted. ─── top of the 14th ───────────────────────── extra innings: top of the 14th Something is wrong with the air. Wet Umbrella Dennis (between-floors) crushes one as the song peaks. The doors briefly open, then shut. Forgotten Gym Bag Janice (hum-along) sends a base hit between the mirrored panels. Suspiciously Damp Carl (elevator-trance) swings during the chorus. The bat connects. ─── bot of the 14th ───────────────────────── Scoreless inning. A flare is almost wasted. FINAL: Lvl42 9 — Boats 4 WEATHER: Captain's Council ⚓ CAPTAIN'S COUNCIL: Roy (Captain Emeritus) finally figured out the glove. +1 GLOVE (now 10.0).