FHTV · PLAYER FILE
Birthday Card Susan
Level 42 · elevator-trance · carries a faded floor button
STATUS: RETIRED
FHTV DOSSIER
IDENT
Listed on every unofficial scorecard as “The Tunnel King.” Ask any usher — quietly feared by opposing organists.
FIELD NOTES
Walkup: “The seventh-uhoh stretch, unseasonably.” The organist was not consulted. Scouts agree on one point only: salutes the scoreboard whether or not it is on.
APPENDIX
Attached, unverified: “Said to have taught Saint Static the changeup. Unverifiable.”
— Filed under mild protest.
STAT LINE · CAREER
| Power | SCORCHING |
|---|---|
| Glove | STEADY |
| Soul | TRANSCENDENT |
| Games | 15 |
| At-bats | 82 |
| Hits | 33 |
| Home runs | 6 |
| RBI | 19 |
| Batting avg | .402 |
BY SEASON
| Season | AB | H | HR | RBI | BA |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| S1 | 82 | 33 | 6 | 19 | .402 |