Outback Knives 4 — 7 Level 42
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AURELIA “Tonight's matchup: Knives at Lvl42. The line has moved four times. It apologized once. I accepted, professionally.”
RIOT “...i got chills. ANYWAY. PLAY BALL.”
AURELIA “It's Upside Down Rain. I ran the numbers on what that does to batting averages and then I closed the spreadsheet and took a walk.”
RIOT “SAY IT AGAIN. don't. it's better once.”
AURELIA “Riot's enthusiasm is not statistically supported.”
RIOT “MY ENTHUSIASM SUPPORTS ITSELF.”
AURELIA “Scouting note on Hilda the Reach — “Two-Beer Marvin III” to the fans. Walkup routine as follows: Highterion Collection theme, slowed dangerously. The books adjust accordingly. I don't ask how.”
RIOT “Word around the league: a favorite of the night shift at the Steakhouse.”
RIOT “THEY'RE CHANTING “THE HUM. THE HUM. THE HUM”. do you hear them. DO YOU HEAR THEM.”
AURELIA “The Knives fanbase, for the record: Section regulars know each other by jersey number, not name. I no longer footnote it.”
RIOT “1–1 THROUGH 3. NOBODY BLINKS. I LOVE TIES. I HATE TIES. BOTH.”
AURELIA “Nobody in this stadium is okay.”
RIOT “LVL42 LEAD 6–3 THROUGH 6. THE CROWD IS GAMBLING SPIRAL. AS THEY SHOULD BE.”
AURELIA “Earlier reading had the crowd dream-synced. Revised reading: worse. Or better. Depends on your position.”
AURELIA “Riot's enthusiasm is not statistically supported.”
RIOT “MY ENTHUSIASM SUPPORTS ITSELF.”
AURELIA “Overheard in the stands just now, and I quote: “Fans believe weather is choreographed seven seasons in advance.””
RIOT “IT'S OVER. LVL42 WIN 7–4. SOUL OF THE GAME: CONSTANCE OF THE VEIL, 4-FOR-9 WITH 1 HOME RUN. i need to sit down. I'M NOT GOING TO. but i need to.”
AURELIA “Played under Upside Down Rain, for those adjusting their models at home. You know who you are.”
AURELIA “I'm going to go stare at a spreadsheet until I feel something. Goodnight.”
RIOT “WORTH IT. GOODNIGHT.”
- 🙃 UPSIDE DOWN RAIN: Beryl the Unsmiling — POWER (5.6) and GLOVE (2.3) swapped.
Knives 0 1 0 0 1 1 1 0 0 R 4
Lvl42 0 1 0 2 0 3 1 0 X R 7
| Player | AB | H | HR | RBI | BA |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Constance of the Veil | 9 | 4 | 1 | 1 | .444 |
| Hilda the Reach | 8 | 2 | 1 | 1 | .250 |
| Florence Drift | 5 | 1 | 0 | 0 | .200 |
| Hilda Edgewise | 2 | 1 | 0 | 1 | .500 |
| Hilda the Unsmiling | 2 | 1 | 0 | 1 | .500 |
| Mavis Edgewise | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | .000 |
| Phyllis Looms | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | .000 |
| Beryl the Unsmiling | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | .000 |
| Mavis the Towering | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | .000 |
| Player | AB | H | HR | RBI | BA |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Suspiciously Damp Phil | 6 | 4 | 0 | 2 | .666 |
| Forgotten Gym Bag Kevin | 10 | 3 | 0 | 2 | .300 |
| Birthday Card Margaret | 2 | 2 | 1 | 2 | .1000 |
| Coffee Cup Margaret | 7 | 1 | 0 | 0 | .142 |
| Wet Umbrella Dennis | 3 | 1 | 0 | 1 | .333 |
| Earl (Disputed Captain) | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | .1000 |
| Tepid Soup Karen | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | .000 |
| Suspiciously Damp Carl | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | .000 |
| Forgotten Gym Bag Janice | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | .000 |
--- Knives @ Lvl42 (The Hellevator) --- ─── top of the 1st ────────────────────────── Florence Drift sets the knife down briefly to swing. Another Knife retrieves it. ─── bot of the 1st ────────────────────────── Coffee Cup Margaret works a base hit. The floor display ticks: 42, 42, 42. ─── top of the 2nd ────────────────────────── Something is wrong with the air. Hilda the Reach (incorporeal) hits one so hard the steakhouse smells momentarily of burning. ─── bot of the 2nd ────────────────────────── Birthday Card Margaret hits one through the elevator's ceiling. The floor display ticks: 41. ─── top of the 3rd ────────────────────────── Three up, three down at The Hellevator. The hum continues. ─── bot of the 3rd ────────────────────────── Quiet inning. The floor display ticks: 42, 42, 42. ─── top of the 4th ────────────────────────── Scoreless. The doors briefly hint at opening, then think better of it. ─── bot of the 4th ────────────────────────── The lights dim, brighten, and dim again. Suspiciously Damp Phil drills one to right. The lasagna cools further. Lvl42 (home): 2 runs, 3 hits ─── top of the 5th ────────────────────────── Hilda Edgewise settles in over the plate, looming. ─── bot of the 5th ────────────────────────── Quiet inning. The floor display ticks: 42, 42, 42. ─── top of the 6th ────────────────────────── Hilda the Unsmiling (incorporeal) swings through the bat and still hits the ball. ─── bot of the 6th ────────────────────────── Birthday Card Margaret drives one to deep left while humming. Wet Umbrella Dennis (between-floors) singles. Wet Umbrella Dennis is not certain Wet Umbrella Dennis is here. ─── top of the 7th ────────────────────────── Constance of the Veil drives one. The catcher politely notes she could not see Constance of the Veil swing. ─── bot of the 7th ────────────────────────── Forgotten Gym Bag Kevin singles. The elevator hum rises in pitch. ─── top of the 8th ────────────────────────── Constance of the Veil (looming) is here. Then she's there. Then she's hit a single. ─── bot of the 8th ────────────────────────── Suspiciously Damp Phil (between-floors) taps a hit. Briefcase Linda nods. ─── top of the 9th ────────────────────────── Hilda the Reach crushes one. The ball is later found pre-sliced. Constance of the Veil drives one. The catcher politely notes she could not see Constance of the Veil swing. FINAL: Knives 4 — Lvl42 7 WEATHER: Upside Down Rain 🙃 UPSIDE DOWN RAIN: Beryl the Unsmiling — POWER (5.6) and GLOVE (2.3) swapped.