Boat Boys 6 — 1 The Bobs
♡ Bob War flickered back on. Wear something flame-retardant.
BROADCAST DETAILS
RIOT “BOATS AT BOBS AND THE AIR TASTES LIKE PENNIES. that's baseball weather, baby.”
VESPER “And I'm legally required to be here for it ♡”
VESPER “Oh, and it's Bob War Reignites. I'd say stay safe but you bought tickets to this, so.”
RIOT “WATCH STEVE (ALSO CAPTAIN). THEY CALL THEM “The Sacrifice” AND THE NICKNAME IS EARNED.”
VESPER “Word around the league: beloved by the kind of fan who brings a radio to the stadium.”
VESPER “Listen to that — Bobs fans doing “STAY. STAY. STAY” in perfect sync. They practiced. You can tell they practiced ♡”
VESPER “One-run game, Bobs on top, 4 uhohs in. My nails are gone. The crowd is overconfident. We are all doing great.”
RIOT “The locals are getting religious.”
VESPER “Tied at 1. Nobody's blinking. I blinked, but I'm a professional.”
RIOT “AN HOUR AGO THE CROWD WAS OVERCONFIDENT. LOOK AT THEM NOW. LOOK AT THEM.”
VESPER “That's the ballgame~ Final: Boats 6, Bobs 1. Soul of the game: Bob's Cousin Bob, 3-for-5. Drive home carefully. Or don't — I'm a broadcast, not your mother.”
RIOT “AND THAT WAS *WITH* BOB WAR REIGNITES GOING ON. UNBELIEVABLE.”
RIOT “DRINK WATER. RESPECT NOBODY. GOODNIGHT.”
VESPER “We are emotionally archived too. Goodnight.”
- ⚔ BOB WAR REIGNITES: Exhausted Bob With A Knife and Small Bob-3000 swap their Power.
Boats 0 0 0 0 0 1 0 5 0 R 6
Bobs 1 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 R 1
| Player | AB | H | HR | RBI | BA |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Wayne (Disputed Captain) | 8 | 2 | 0 | 2 | .250 |
| Earl (Disputed Captain) | 2 | 2 | 0 | 1 | .1000 |
| Chuck (Co-Captain) | 5 | 1 | 0 | 1 | .200 |
| Roy (Captain Emeritus) | 4 | 1 | 0 | 0 | .250 |
| Stan (Also Captain) | 1 | 1 | 0 | 1 | .1000 |
| Hank (The Real Captain) | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | .000 |
| Steve (Also Captain) | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | .000 |
| Player | AB | H | HR | RBI | BA |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Bob's Cousin Bob | 5 | 3 | 0 | 0 | .600 |
| Bob's Cousin Bob With A Knife | 5 | 3 | 0 | 0 | .600 |
| Tall Bob Bob | 6 | 2 | 0 | 1 | .333 |
| Small Bob-3000 | 5 | 2 | 0 | 0 | .400 |
| Hereditary Bobina | 4 | 1 | 0 | 0 | .250 |
| Hungover Bob-3000 | 3 | 1 | 0 | 0 | .333 |
| Reformed Bobstradamus | 5 | 0 | 0 | 0 | .000 |
| Exhausted Bob With A Knife | 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | .000 |
| Greater Bob Bob | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | .000 |
--- Boats @ Bobs (The Bob Pit) --- ─── top of the 1st ────────────────────────── Nothing scored. A Bob in section 4 is denouncing a Bob in section 9. ─── bot of the 1st ────────────────────────── Tall Bob Bob clubs a double. The Bob War temporarily dissolves into mutual envy. Bob's Cousin Bob (knife-adjacent) lines a single. A neighboring Bob audibly considers a coup. Bobs (home): 1 run, 2 hits ─── top of the 2nd ────────────────────────── Earl (Disputed Captain) hits one to the gap. A different Captain explains how he would have hit it harder. ─── bot of the 2nd ────────────────────────── Bob's Cousin Bob With A Knife steps in. Three Bobs in the on-deck circle accuse each other of treason. ─── top of the 3rd ────────────────────────── A quiet inning. The Bobs of section 12 mutiny against the rest of section 12. ─── bot of the 3rd ────────────────────────── A quiet inning. The Bobs of section 12 mutiny against the rest of section 12. ─── top of the 4th ────────────────────────── A quiet inning. The Bobs of section 12 mutiny against the rest of section 12. ─── bot of the 4th ────────────────────────── Three up, three down at The Bob Pit. The Bobs jeer their own. ─── top of the 5th ────────────────────────── A quiet inning. The Bobs of section 12 mutiny against the rest of section 12. ─── bot of the 5th ────────────────────────── Bob's Cousin Bob With A Knife (muttering) swings furiously. The other Bobs heckle. ─── top of the 6th ────────────────────────── Wayne (Disputed Captain) pokes a single. A long anecdote about a fishing trip begins on second. Boats (away): 1 run, 1 hit ─── bot of the 6th ────────────────────────── Small Bob-3000 (settling scores) singles, sneers at a different Bob. Bob's Cousin Bob singles, sneers at a different Bob. ─── top of the 7th ────────────────────────── Roy (Captain Emeritus) (grilling-adjacent) bats. Several Captains stand at the rail and grimace knowingly. ─── bot of the 7th ────────────────────────── Bob's Cousin Bob (knife-adjacent) singles. Somewhere a Bob is sharpening something. Small Bob-3000 (settling scores) lines a single. A neighboring Bob audibly considers a coup. ─── top of the 8th ────────────────────────── The lights dim, brighten, and dim again. Earl (Captain Emeritus) (loud about lawns) hammers one past the diving second baseman. The dads applaud their own dock. Chuck (Co-Captain) works a hit, then yells something about thermostats. ─── bot of the 8th ────────────────────────── Hereditary Bobina drives one into the gap. Two Bobs nearly come to blows in the dugout. ─── top of the 9th ────────────────────────── Nothing scored. A Bob in section 4 is denouncing a Bob in section 9. ─── bot of the 9th ────────────────────────── Tall Bob Bob (muttering) works a long at-bat under pointed Bob scrutiny. FINAL: Boats 6 — Bobs 1 WEATHER: Bob War Reignites ⚔ BOB WAR REIGNITES: Exhausted Bob With A Knife and Small Bob-3000 swap their Power.