The Bobs 16 — 6 Outback Knives
BROADCAST DETAILS
AURELIA “Bobs at Knives, The Steakhouse. The books opened cautious and got nervous from there.”
RIOT “CORRECT. FIRST PITCH IMMINENT. HYDRATE.”
AURELIA “Scouting note on Bob's Cousin Bob — “Ground Rule Agent” to the fans. Walkup routine as follows: Foghorn into smooth jazz. The books adjust accordingly. I don't ask how.”
RIOT “Word around the league: a favorite of the night shift at the Steakhouse.”
RIOT “THE BOBS SECTION IS CHANTING “ANOTHER ONE. ANOTHER ONE” AND HONESTLY? SAME.”
AURELIA “Sixteen ticks of movement. Nobody knows why. Nobody ever knows why.”
AURELIA “Filed under 'the Bobs crowd, again': Most supporters arrive with at least one superstition.”
RIOT “BOBS 6. KNIVES 0. THAT'S NOT A SCORE THAT'S A CRIME SCENE.”
AURELIA “A wave attempt has failed three sections in a row.”
AURELIA “Official incident log, for the bettors tracking such things: Emergency cleanup crew entered from the wrong tunnel. No line movement. Yet.”
RIOT “SAY IT AGAIN. don't. it's better once.”
RIOT “BOBS 14. KNIVES 4. THAT'S NOT A SCORE THAT'S A CRIME SCENE.”
AURELIA “An entire section is leaving. With dignity. Some of it.”
AURELIA “Overheard in the stands just now, and I quote: “Older fans insist the league already knows the ending.””
AURELIA “That's a final — 16–6. Soul of the game: Greater Bob Bob, 7-for-9. Everything I predicted was wrong in an instructive way. Good night to the ledger.”
RIOT “ha. HA.”
AURELIA “Margins held. Some didn't. Settling accordingly. Goodnight.”
RIOT “GOODNIGHT. I MEAN IT. GO.”
Bobs 1 2 2 1 5 3 1 1 0 R 16
Knives 0 0 0 0 3 1 1 0 1 R 6
| Player | AB | H | HR | RBI | BA |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Greater Bob Bob | 9 | 7 | 0 | 5 | .777 |
| Small Bob-3000 | 7 | 3 | 0 | 1 | .428 |
| Hereditary Bobina | 7 | 3 | 0 | 2 | .428 |
| Hungover Bob-3000 | 6 | 3 | 0 | 2 | .500 |
| Reformed Bobstradamus | 4 | 3 | 0 | 2 | .750 |
| Tall Bob Bob | 6 | 2 | 0 | 1 | .333 |
| Bob's Cousin Bob | 5 | 2 | 0 | 1 | .400 |
| Bob's Cousin Bob With A Knife | 5 | 1 | 0 | 1 | .200 |
| Exhausted Bob With A Knife | 3 | 1 | 0 | 1 | .333 |
| Player | AB | H | HR | RBI | BA |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Hilda Edgewise | 7 | 3 | 0 | 2 | .428 |
| Beryl the Unsmiling | 5 | 2 | 0 | 2 | .400 |
| Constance of the Veil | 5 | 2 | 1 | 0 | .400 |
| Mavis Edgewise | 4 | 1 | 0 | 0 | .250 |
| Hilda the Reach | 1 | 1 | 0 | 0 | .1000 |
| Mavis the Towering | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | .000 |
| Hilda the Unsmiling | 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | .000 |
--- Bobs @ Knives (The Steakhouse) --- ─── top of the 1st ────────────────────────── Greater Bob Bob (war-weary) fouls one off and points at another Bob. Reasons unclear. Bob's Cousin Bob pokes a hit. The clipboard-Bobs make a note. ─── bot of the 1st ────────────────────────── Three up, three down at The Steakhouse. The Knives go quietly. Somewhere a knife clatters. ─── top of the 2nd ────────────────────────── Small Bob-3000 (settling scores) singles, sneers at a different Bob. Tall Bob Bob drives one to right. Three Bobs simultaneously call timeout for unrelated reasons. ─── bot of the 2nd ────────────────────────── Three up, three down at The Steakhouse. The Knives go quietly. Somewhere a knife clatters. ─── top of the 3rd ────────────────────────── Something is wrong with the air. Reformed Bobstradamus fouls one off and points at another Bob. Reasons unclear. Exhausted Bob With A Knife (uneasy ceasefire) pokes a hit. The clipboard-Bobs make a note. ─── bot of the 3rd ────────────────────────── Mavis Edgewise swings through the bat and still hits the ball. ─── top of the 4th ────────────────────────── Hereditary Bobina hits one off the wall. The Bobs cheer, then immediately regroup against the cheering Bob. Reformed Bobstradamus slaps a hit while another Bob loudly disagrees with the call. ─── bot of the 4th ────────────────────────── Nothing happens. A complimentary side cools, undisturbed. ─── top of the 5th ────────────────────────── Something is wrong with the air. Hereditary Bobina singles. Somewhere a Bob is sharpening something. Greater Bob Bob (war-weary) bunts. The Bobs argue for nine straight minutes about what a bunt is. ─── bot of the 5th ────────────────────────── Something is wrong with the air. Hilda Edgewise sends a home run into the parking lot. The valet, who is also a ghost, shrugs. Beryl the Unsmiling (looming) reaches for one and somehow makes contact. Constance of the Veil carves a base hit through the gap. ─── top of the 6th ────────────────────────── Hungover Bob-3000 singles, sneers at a different Bob. Greater Bob Bob clubs a double. The Bob War temporarily dissolves into mutual envy. ─── bot of the 6th ────────────────────────── Phyllis Looms (looming) sends one out. The neon sign reading 'STEAKS' sputters meaningfully. ─── top of the 7th ────────────────────────── Reformed Bobstradamus (settling scores) hits one off the wall. The Bobs cheer, then immediately regroup against the cheering Bob. ─── bot of the 7th ────────────────────────── Phyllis Looms (looming) sends a home run into the parking lot. The valet, who is also a ghost, shrugs. Constance of the Veil sets the knife down briefly to swing. Another Knife retrieves it. Hilda the Reach singles. The Steakhouse smells more strongly. ─── top of the 8th ────────────────────────── Greater Bob Bob grounds a single past the shortstop, still glaring at his cousin Bob. Small Bob-3000 (settling scores) works the count. A Bob in the stands stands up and announces he is leaving the war. ─── bot of the 8th ────────────────────────── Phyllis Looms (looming) singles. The Steakhouse smells more strongly. ─── top of the 9th ────────────────────────── Three up, three down at The Steakhouse. The Knives go quietly. Somewhere a knife clatters. ─── bot of the 9th ────────────────────────── Beryl the Unsmiling drives one past the third baseman. The complimentary side at her seat is now cold. Hilda Edgewise singles. The Steakhouse smells more strongly. FINAL: Bobs 16 — Knives 6